Heeeeeee's Heeeeeere!!

Ok, well, he's BEEN here! LOL! Brock Anthony Barbosa was born on Wednesday, May 18th at 10:14 am. He was 20.25" long and weighed 8 lbs 12 oz. He will be 11 weeks old this Wednesday and the time has FLOWN! I will make this one long blog about his first few days, then I will be starting a new blog 'Brock Talk' that will have updates on his growth, milestones, and mommy advice!!

My last week of pregnancy I got this condition called PUPPS (pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy). It only happens to about 1% of pregnant women and somehow I managed to get it. I figured I was due one bad symptom because the rest of my pregnancy was so wonderful. It was incredibly uncomfortable because every part of my body just itched like crazy. And the more I would scratch, the more it would itch! My doctor called in pills, cream, everything and nothing really helped. It was definitely not something I would wish on anyone, but they say the chances of it happening again are very very rare.

As I talked about in previous posts, due to my 'narrow' anatomy and the predicted size of Baby B, my doctor made the decision to schedule a c-section before his due date, but after the 'safe' point. She didn't want him to get much bigger but she wanted to make sure we gave him every chance to be fully developed. My c-section was scheduled for Wednedsay so I made the previous Friday my last day at work before maternity leave. Those first 2 days of the week at home were TORTURE!! I was so anxious/nervous/excited...Monday I cooked tons of food, cleaned the house, made sure all our bags were ready and that the baby's room was ready to go. I even got out in the terrible heat and trimmed all of our bushes in front of our house!! LOL! Tuesday was a different story, that's when the panic set in. Not really panic of having a baby, but of being cut open!! I was terrified and a total mess! I hadn't slept for 3 days because I was just thinking about it, so with the 'ok' of the nurses I took some Tylenol PM the night before my surgery to get a good nights sleep. It helped SO MUCH!

The day of the surgery I woke up ready to go. Since it was already scheduled, I took a shower, shaved my legs, did my hair and make up, as many things as I could do to make myself feel 'pretty' before going in to the hospital. I knew I probably wouldn't be able to do those things for awhile so I made sure I went in feeling as good as possible! Nick's stomach was in knots so we had to stop by and get him some calming medicine on the way to the hospital!! LOL! Again, since it was scheduled we got in right away. As soon as we walked into our room, they had all these needles and medical equipment laid out and I lost it. They took my blood pressure and it was super high due to my nerves! LOL! The nurses were so wonderful and got me calmed down. The doctor was ready to go early so my 10:30 scheduled time was bumped up to a little before 10am. Having (very fortunately) never been a patient in a hospital before, I was soooo scared of the anesthesia, the procedure, everything. When they first took me back to the room, Nick wasn't allowed to come with me until I was totally numb and the room was ready. I was so scared they would forget to get him to come in the room!

The nurses did the best job of telling me what was going on, keeping me calm and getting me ready for the surgery. The anesthesia was a very strange feeling. It almost felt like a big weight on my chest at first. But once the doctor started going, things progressed super fast. They surgery started at about 10 and by 10:14 our beautiful baby boy was screaming and peeing all over the place! The first thing our doctor said was 'He looks just like his Dad!' I'll never forget that feeling when I heard his little scream and saw his precious face when she lifted him over the curtain for me to see him. He was absolutely perfect and I just started crying tears of joy immediately. He pee'd all over everything as they were weighing him!! Definitely showing his 'boy' personality.

They got him weighed, measured and cleaned up and then gave him to Nick. Nick brought him over to me and he was still crying and as soon as he heard my voice, he stopped and tried to open his eyes to see me! That was an amazing feeling. The lights were too bright so he couldn't get them open right away, but he knew his mama was right there! My doctor got me stitched back up really quickly and we were being wheeled to our room! I got to hold him on our way to the room and that's when he really opened his eyes for the first time. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen! As they wheeled us in to our room, both our families were huddled in the waiting room peeking in and taking pics like paparazzi!!

Nick and I got to spend an hour of time with just us and the baby. He nursed a little bit, did some skin to skin time with Mommy and mostly just laid there while we both stared at him in total amazement! They gave him his first little bath and put him under the warmer. That's when we let the families come in and see him. My dad, Mom, Pat, Mia, Gary and Judy were the first ones in the room and they were all just looking at him and taking pictures! He just laid on the warmer totally alert letting them all check him out. We announced his name and everyone was so excited!

We were in the hospital just over 3 days and had so many visitors! We felt so blessed to have so many people come excited to meet our little angel! We were shocked by how alert Brock was from the beginning. He was already start to pick his head up off my chest from the first day! The nurses at St. Luke's South were unbelievably amazing!! I decided that as soon as I could have all the tubest taken out of me and I could start moving around, I wanted to. They were so supportive and helped me through everything. Wednesday night was the earliest I could get everything taken out/off and as long as I could walk to the bathroom, they said I was good to go. I couldn't get that stuff off soon enough! I was up walking that night and able to take a shower and start walking more the next day.

I think moving so soon actually helped my recovery. I was on minimal pain meds after I left the hospital and really only took them at home for about the first week. Now, emotionally was a totally different story. I should probably dedicate an entire blog to this, but I'll just add it here. The night we got home, I hit a wall. I think my hormones totally bottomed out and I was so exhausted that I just couldn't function. I was anxious, tired and an emotional mess! This continued for about a week. The 2nd day we were home was the worst. I spent the ENTIRE day crying. I could barely hold Brock because it would just make me sad. I felt so overwhelmed and like I all of the sudden wasn't ready for this. I felt like I missed our old life of being able to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. I felt guilty for feeling that way because we had this amazing, beautiful, HEALTHY baby boy. These were all feelings I NEVER expected to feel. I thought you fall so deeply in love that you're just in this cloud of bliss after the baby. While I was unconditionally in love with this little baby, I was struggling at the same time. My doctor called it the 'Baby Blues' and apparently it's very very common and most women experience it on some level. I had never heard of it before so I was feeling like the worst mother in the world at first! Learning that it's a very normal thing actually helped me cope. Nick and my mom literally saved me during those first 48 hours home. The first night was rough, so my mom spent the night the 2nd night and they took care of the baby while I got some good sleep. That made a WORLD of difference and each day got a little better than the last. I think it's important to talk about this because all women should know you're not a terrible mom or alone if you have these feelings!

Breastfeeding was hands down the most difficult thing I've ever done. While Brock was a total champ when he was trying to latch and was so patient and never really got frustrated. In fac, he would almost get 'too comfy' and would fall asleep every time I tried to nurse. When we left the hospital he was down to 8lbs 4 oz and a little dehydrated so they had us supplementing with a little newborn formula to keep his weight up. It got to the point that when nursing, he would fall asleep so hard that nothing would wake him up. We tried cold rags, pinching/poking him, clothes on, clothes off, changing his diaper, none of it would keep him up for more than a few minutes, if that. It was such an intense struggle, but see the first post in 'Brock Talk' for how we got through it.

Overall, the whole experience is exactly what everyone says it will be and more. People tell you, 'your life is going to change' and 'you're going to fall in love more than you know' and all I can say is they are SO RIGHT, but it's something you can never really grasp until you're there. Every day I love Brock more and more (which I didn't even think was possible) and I've learned more about myself in the past 11 weeks than I have in my whole life. I've learned it's ok to be vulnerable and to let other people help you. I've learned I'm both stronger and weaker than I thought - both in different areas. I've learned what it really means to love something so much it hurts. And more importantly, I've learned about putting someone else 100% before myself. I've also learned about what's really important in life. I've already noticed a few people that I have cut out of my life just because they bring nothing but negative energy. I gained almost 70 lbs with him and while it kills me everyday because I have such a long way to go to lose it, I've learned that for once, there is something in my life so much more important than my pant size. Fitting into those old pants as quickly as I would like, would mean missing time out with my son and right now, it's SOOOO not worth it!

For those of you who followed my pregnancy journey, thank you for being there with me!! The ride has just begun and I hope you'll stay with me!! Be sure to check out 'Brock Talk' for updates on him and advice for all you other mommies out there! Oh and for those of you who aren't my friends on Facebook he's a picture of my baby boy on the day he was born:

The waiting game...

38 weeks

Here we are, playing the waiting game!! Baby B could literally make his appearance any minute and we are so excited and ready to meet him!! Everything is about as ready as it could possibly be and we're just waiting for him to give us the green light!

I've had a lot of itching lately on my stomach where these stretchmarks have gotten just out of control. I think the cream I've been using is actually helping them heal, which is causing them to itch, but sometimes it's just unbearable.

We had our breastfeeding class last night and it is a class I would hands down recommend to anyone who plans on breastfeeding. Nick came too and I think it was important to have him there. I know there will be times that I'll get frustrated and want to give up and I think having him there to coach me through using some of the tips we learned last night will help things go more smoothly.

We got the carseats installed last week and that was quite a reality check!! It's crazy to see that base sitting in my car, waiting for the little man to come ride along with me somewhere!

We had a slight 'scare' last week. Not really a scare, but I felt like I was leaking more than normal so we called the doctor. She sent us to the hospital to get checked out and make sure I wasn't leaking any amniotic fluid or anything. Everything checked out fine and as usual, little man was showing off his acrobatics on the monitor and we could hear him kicking and moving around!

We got see the doctor again on Thursday of this week and she's going to check to see if he's dropped any further and if my cervix has opened any. If not, she thinks she'll want to schedule a c-section for anytime between 39-40 weeks. If he has, I'm not quite sure what she'll recommend for us! My birthday is Friday and Mother's Day is Sunday so it'd be the greatest gift of all to get to have him by then, but whenever he decides he's ready. On one hand, I'm so ready to meet him and ready to get back to somewhat normal (sleeping on my stomach, wearing normal clothes, walking in a straight line, etc), but on the other, I know this time is limited and you only get to be pregnant the first time, one time. I want to enjoy it as much as possible.

This past week I've had a lot of nausea, heartburn and even some contractions!! So far none of them have been consistent enough to even think about calling the doctor. It's a weird feeling because yes they are painful and pain is bad, but I almost find myself wanting them to keep going in hopes that this is the real deal! We compared Nick and I's newborn pictures and judging from the sonogram, I think Baby B is gonna look a lot like his Daddy! We'll see hopefully very very soon!

Letter to my little man...

My sweet baby boy,

We are weeks (maybe even days) from being able to finally see your precious angel face. The time has flown by, yet it feels like eternity all at the same time. I simply cannot wait to hold you, kiss you, hug you, stare at you and watch you grow. You have already given your Dad and I so much joy and you aren't even here yet!

I am already so proud of you and unbelievably honored to be your Mommy. You have made the past 9 months the most amazing experience of my life. From hearing you first hearbeat, to getting the first peek at you and learning that you were our baby BOY (which we knew all along), to feeling your first kicks, hiccups and rolls, to even the uncomfortable parts. All of it was worth every second and I would do it again in a heartbeat for the chance to bring you into this world.

Every day I wake up hoping today may be the day I get to finally meet you face to face. While at the same time, I'm trying to soak up every last minute of the pregnancy. Every kick, roll, hiccup means just a little more now because I know they are numbered. They are feelings I imagine I will miss every day. I have loved and cherished being able to have you with me, every minute of every day and knowing that you are safe.

Everything and everyone is ready for you! Your room is waiting for you, the bassinet is sitting right next to my side of the bed, all your clothes are washed and put away and you already have more toys than you'll know what to do with. You big brother Oscar doesn't know it yet, but he's very excited to meet you! I think he will be very protective of you! Your grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and all our friends are counting down the days to meet you. You are one lucky and very loved little boy.

The hospital bags are packed with everything any book could ever say we could need or want to have with us. We have gone to every class we could find to be sure we were doing everything just right for you. We've gone to what feels like a million doctor's appointments, taken all the right vitamins, tried to eat well and get some excercise. But none of that matters as much as getting to be your Mommy. You don't know it yet, but your Mommy is sort of a 'planner'. I like to do things in advance and have everything as close to perfect as possible. So I have done everything I could think of to get prepared for your arrival. However, something tells me nothing can truly prepare me for what's about to happen! The good, the bad, and the ugly...I have no real clue what to expect and for once, I couldn't be more excited about it. Whatever it takes to make sure you are safe, healthy and happy, is all I care about.

Mother's Day is this Sunday and while I don't know if you'll be here for it, I still feel like a Mommy already! Taking care of myself to better take care of you for the last 9 months has been the biggest job I've ever had in my life. I didn't do everything perfectly or always the right way, but everything was for you. From here on out, you come before anything and everything in my life. Your health, happiness and safety come before my own and it's something I totally give up for you, without a seconds hesitation.

I can't promise to be the perfect parent, but I can promise with all my heart that I will love you unconditionally for the rest of my life and beyond. You already are the biggest blessing I have ever had in my life and can't wait to see the person you become and share your life with you.

I love you baby boy!
Mommy

Longest PMS Ever??

37 weeks

I think I can only describe these last couple of weeks as having the longest PMS ever. Not necessarily the hunger but the mood swings! I don't think I've ever been so irritable in my entire life. I'm sure it's exhaustion, combined with the restlessness and desire to meet this little man, but it's bad. It's hard to just be normal and nice to my friends and family that I LOVE, let alone people who aren't exactly my favorite! I'm just hoping I can make it through these last few weeks without blowing up on anyone!!

Baby's movements have definitely slowed down as he's running out of room. He mostly just rolls from side to side now, but he'll give me the occasional kick or two for good measure. I still feel really good in terms of just day to day. I get really exhausted in the afternoons, but I feel ok which is a blessing. The belly is getting so heavy and almost hard to carry around all the time! I don't feel totally miserable, but I can see how women can very easily be 'over' pregnancy at this point.

My bag is mostly packed and ready to go and Baby's bag is completely ready. We have all the cameras charged and packed too! I've had a few 'pre' labor symptoms - diarrhea, extreme fatigue, contractions, lower back pain, but I still feel like it'll be at least another week or two. After Kristin's baby shower this Saturday, I'm going to start all the 'at home' tricks I can to get him out!! LOL!

We have our newborn class tonight and the car seats get installed/inspected on Thursday. I think that will make things even more real when we have those car seat bases in the car ready to go! I need to clean the house one last time before he comes but that 'nesting' instinct just can't overcome the exhaustion I feel every day. We brought the bassinet up from the basement last night and put it in place. It's crazy seeing it there! But, I want Oscar to get used to having it there so it's not a total shock when there's a baby sleeping in it!

At this point, just waiting to meet this little man! The thought that it could happen any day is exciting and definitely helps make each day easier, but I'm sure that'll only last for about a week and when it STILL hasn't happened it won't be as helpful! LOL! I go to see the doctor again tomorrow and we'll see where we are at that point and try and get an idea of when we can get this little man out!!

7 lb wonder

36 weeks

Well, we already knew that Baby B was going to be big....but I don't think we were quite prepared for our doctor's appointment on Monday. At the sonogram, they estimated his weight right now at about 7 pounds!!! He wasn't quite as much of a model this time, but we got a GREAT picture of him flexing his muscles and a great profile shot! He had his ankles crossed over each other, stretching out his legs and yawning like he was super cozy!
Here is the muscle shot, ladies, watch out!

I saw the doctor the next day and she's estimating him at 9 pounds if we go full term. I'm not dilated or anything yet. However, with my height, his size and some other 'anatomical' issues (aka: narrow girl parts), we have started discussing some other options. She went over when and why to induce and also talked a lot about a c-section. I've always considered myself pretty open to the idea of having a c-section if the need arose. However, I didn't realize how while I was thinking that, I was also thinking that it wouldn't even be necessary. After talking to the doctor, we may be leaning more towards that given all of the factors stacked against us. At this point, the chance of complications maybe be greater with a natural delivery.

The doctor said I just need to go into labor asap! LOL! She said this will help not only know that his lungs are mature and he's ready to come out, but also gives us a chance of him being small enough to possibly pass vaginally. I was having some slight contractions Monday night, but they were irregular and I haven't had any since yesterday afternoon.

We had a wonderful couple's baby shower this weekend and got some great books and diapers for the little man. We finally got some of the 'jean' diapers Nick wanted so badly! We also finished off the things we thought we would need from our registry. We got a cart full of stuff, but other than the Pack 'N Play, I can barely remember what else we got! LOL! We also re-arranged the nursery a little and put up new blinds. We got our video camera also and can't wait to catch all of Baby B's milestones and be able to share them with everyone!!

At this point, it's just a waiting game. We are hoping he'll decide to make his appearance very soon!

Maternity 'Must Haves'

Before this pregnancy is all said and done, I thought I'd make a list of things that I couldn't live without during this experience. They may or may not be for everyone, but they definitely things that made my life easier, more comfortable or just more convenient. They are in no particular order, so here goes:

- Be Maternity rouched tank tops from Target - They are $24.99 a piece which is kinda pricey, but I wear them every single day under my shirts. They are the greatest things EVER!! I have a white one and a black one. They are comfortable and smooth everything out nicely. I would recommend getting at least one in white and one in either black or grey.

- Full panel maternity jeans - Old Navy had the best ones for me, but probably anywhere with full panel would work. It makes a world of difference as the belly gets bigger.

- A body/maternity pillow - I got the Boppy body pillow pretty early on because I was having serious hip pains at night. It was a life saver!! I've almost worn it out now so it doesn't have quite the same effect it used to, but it's still good for propping up in bed or on the couch.

- An 'App' (if possible) for your phone to track your pregnancy - I had 3 different ones on my phone AND a couple saved as favorites on my computer. Some gave weekly and some daily updates on what to expect for that part of the pregnancy, approximately what size baby should be, and other tips for dealing with different parts of pregnancy. It has become one of the first things I do in the morning is check and see what little tips they have for that day! I got a lot of good information from them. I recommend the 'What to Expect When You're Expecting' App if available.

- A Tide stain remover pen- I have gotten so clumsy, especially here at the end, and I spill something on myself almost daily! These come in handy to prevent the stain from getting too 'cozy' on my clothes!

- A small travel pill box/container - I take 3 vitamins per day (pre natal, calcium with Vitamin D and DHA supplement) and rather than lug around bottles to keep at work, at home and everywhere in between, I got this perfect little pill holder from GNC that I can keep in my purse. It's helped me stay on track with taking all my pills whether I'm home, at work, out of town or just running errands!

- A pen/paper for your purse - As the pregnancy has progressed, my already lousy memory has gotten somehow much worse. If I don't write something down, it might as well be good as gone. So this has been helpful to have if I need to start making a grocery list, errand list, whatever.

- Fun jewelry - I know this is a weird one, BUT, as I've gotten bigger and clothes aren't looking quite as good on me, I've found that having jewelry to dress up an outfit has helped me feel so much better! A lot of maternity clothes are pretty 'plain' so having something to dress it up for work has given me more options (ie - a plain white tshirt that I bought to wear for errands became totally work appropriate with the right necklace/bracelets, etc).

- A 'back up', easy, quick hairstyle - Again, another weird one. However, as I've gotten more uncomfortable and more tired near the end, having a quick hairstyle that I can do and still look somewhat put together has helped me catch those extra 20 minutes of sleep that I may not live without. Not only that, I've gotten to a point where I'm hot all the time and the thought of getting out the blowdryer and Chi to get my hair 'perfect' sounds less than appealing some days.

- A Babies R Us Member card BEFORE you register, along with signing up for Destination Maternity or any other maternity/baby stores' email lists. - I've gotten so many coupons and rewards through these that I've been able to save quite a bit of money buying necessities simply for getting an email. With the BRU rewards, we earned $20 in 'R Us' bucks to use at the store just simply having our rewards card on our registry so that every dollar spent from the registry turned into rewards points for us! Between coupons, these and a few gift cards, we should be able to complete the final things we need off our registry without having to pay anything out of pocket!

- Kleenex, kleenex and more kleenex - Seriously, I kept them at my desk, and anywhere and everywhere I could in our house. As gross as this is, I feel like I have more junk in my nose and have even had the occasional nose bleed so having those handy was a must.

- A Blog! - Obviously since I'm writing this IN my blog, I took advantage. But it was great to have a place to write down what was happening, how I was feeling and what was going on in our lives during each week of the pregnancy. It was a great release for me, but it will also be something we can look back on later and remember and re-live things. It's also been a good thing to share with friends who are pregnant so they can see what to expect or relate to certain things I was going through.

- Tums, Tums and more TUMS! - I kept these in my purse and a big bottle at home. You never quite know what will affect your stomach in a bad way when you're pregnant so having these available at all times was a life saver!

- Tylenol PM - This was on the 'safe' list of medications you can take while pregnant. I didn't need it all the time, but every so often if I'd had a few rough nights of sleep, taking 2 of these would help me get some good rest and sort of catch back up and start feeling like myself again. They didn't make me drowsy or feel out of it the next day either, mostly just took away any aches or pains and helped me get deeper sleep I was lacking.

-  A Vice - Mine is Diet Dr. Pepper. I don't drink it every day, maybe a couple times a week, but it is the ONE thing that has sounded good through the entire pregnancy and it's my little 'gift' to myself. You spend so much time watching what you eat, what you drink, what you breathe, what you do, etc that it's good to give yourself a little something special. This was also perfect for me because it was my 'drink of choice' at girls nights when other people could enjoy beer, wine or something else.

- A large (refillable) water bottle or cup (with a straw) - They want you to drink SO MUCH water and fluids when you're pregnant. I have a large movie theater cup that I keep at my desk that I try and drink a full glass of every day. Then I make sure to drink more water (or juice/milk) at home to get in all my fluids. On the weekends, I get the large Smart Water bottles and try to drink 2 per day and usually that gets me to my max. It gives me an end goal to be sure I'm getting what I need without just guessing.

- Last but not least, I know this is cheesy, but a supportive husband! - I honestly don't know how I would have ever gotten through this process without Nick. From foot rubs, to cleaning the house for a baby shower I was throwing to going on walks with me to bringing my nursery vision to life, he's been so wonderful. That's not to say we haven't had our disagreements here and there, but there is by far no one else I would have wanted to go through this with. Having him there has made this process much easier, more fun and more exciting!

I'm sure there were other things, but these are the ones that stick out mostly to me. As you can tell a lot of these are inexpensive or even free. I'm not a fan of spending all this money for such a short amount of time. I'm all about practicality and comfort. Some of these have been life savers, some have just been nice to have. During this wonderful, scary, exciting, emotional time, every bit of comfort is very welcomed!

Calm before the storm???

35 weeks

This week started off a little rough. I over-did it this weekend - planting flowers and throwing a baby shower on Saturday. Then Princess Diana exhibit (lots of walking) and a walk Sunday night. I went to bed Sunday night with terrible cramping right under my stomach and in my lower back. It was so bad I could barely move in bed and standing up was near impossible. I came to work Monday in lots of pain. I was fine sitting down, but standing up was very difficult and walking was kept to a minimum. Luckily, I had a doctor's appointment already scheduled for that day. What I was feeling was 'round ligament pain' and my doctor said it is very common for this stage, especially with everything I had done over the weekend. NOTE TO SELF - she said with any following pregnancies, this may start earlier than this point!

Everything else with the baby checked out fine. Somehow I managed to gain 5 more pounds since our last appointment - didn't know there was any room left!! My belly is getting BEYOND massive at this point. I was so uncomfortable this entire weekend that I was just ready to get this baby out! Then, a miracle happened...I've gotten 2 FULL nights of sleep with little to no pain and feel great!! I was getting to a point where I didn't think I could make it much longer, but this much needed break has made me think I can get at least through the end of this month :)

Baby B is still moving around a lot! I'll get a little foot or leg. I can tell he's starting to get cramped because there will be times I can feel him from right under my ribs all the way down in my pelvis! I just hope he's in the right position and that the doctor won't have to flip him around before birth!

We watched 'the birth video' last week in birthing class. I was having a very 'scared' day that day and everything about the birth was freaking me out. I was so scared to watch the video and kept my hands over my eyes in case I need to block the view. I missed the 'crowning' part (thank God), but then the baby came out. And she was beautiful and crying and mom and dad were so happy and it just sort of melted away all my fears. As cliche and cheesy as it sounds, seeing that baby just reminded me that there IS a light at the end of this tunnel. I've gotten so used to being pregnant and just 'talking' about the baby. It reminds me of planning a wedding - it's all you talk about, think about, dream about, but it's just an 'idea'. Something that's so far away - no matter how close it may be. And then BAM, the day comes and it goes by so fast and this event that consumed your whole life suddenly becomes a thing of the past. While the baby will never be a 'thing of the past', the day I give birth will be and I just hope to enjoy as much of it as possible because I know it will go so fast.

We had our Baptism class last night and ran into a girl from our high school, Mary, her husband and their ADORABLE little boy Connor. The class was sort of pointless - we just watched a video talking about the significance of Baptism, but it was good to see Mary and meet little Connor. I also went to get pre-registered at the hospital yesterday afternoon. Luckily they have you come in and fill that out beforehand because there was so much paperwork! It took about a good hour to get it all completed! I had to write the baby's name down on a bunch of different forms and it was so strange seeing it in writing. We have been so careful not to say it even at home to avoid any 'slipping' to family members before he's here. Seeing it made it very real. I recently came up with a 'back up' name in case he doesn't look like the name we already have picked out for him and so yesterday I was going back and forth between the 2 names. Nick doesn't like the back up name or even the idea of having one, so I doubt I'll get very far if I think we need it!

At Tracy's baby shower over the weekend, her mother in law gave me some hope! She said she carried her oldest son Steve (who I've known since 4th grade) much like I'm carrying now. She thinks Baby B has dropped with how low he is, but I've been carrying him low for most of the pregnancy. She had a lot of fluid as well and according to her, she lots 25 pounds of fluid at his birth. I'm not holding my breath that I'll lose QUITE that much, but I'd be so happy if that were the case! She said she gives me 3 more weeks and she thinks the baby will come! I hope so! We just want to get through the end of April and then I'm ready to meet my little man! I just want to hold him and kiss him and hug him and stare at him! Poor guy...he doesn't know what's about to hit him!

We have another sonogram next week to get another weight/size measurement and I'm hoping he's not too huge! I've been extra hungry the past week or so I don't know if he's going through a growth spurt or what. I just hope the doctor gives us SOMETHING in terms of when she thinks he'll come. The thought of going all the way to May 20th just seems so impossible. It's probably my own fault, but Nick and I both have been pretty sure that he's going to come early. All of my friends had their babies early and now I'm afraid I'll be the one who goes all the way up to, if not PAST the due date. I'm giving it until the first week or so of May and then I'm doing whatever I can to help speed the process along!

Twins????

34 Weeks

No, I'm not having twins, but apparently it looks that way. We went to Omaha over the weekend for Nick's cousins wedding and I got comments from not 1, but 2 people about me having twins! One was from a cousin who KNOWS I'm not having twins, but just kept swearing there had to be 2 in there because of how big I am. The 2nd was from the lady at the Starbucks counter in our hotel who asked if I was having twins! REALLY PEOPLE? That's up there with asking someone you aren't sure about if they are pregnant or not!! In my 'rational' mind, I know there are reasons why I'm showing so big. I'm short, I have a bigger baby and I have a lot of amniotic fluid. However, none of that makes it any easier to be reminded about!!

I went to the chiropractor on Monday and it helped a little bit with the pain in my hips when I sleep. The first night was great, last night the pain started to come back a little. I go back on Friday and he's going to do some more adjustments and stretching. Hopefully it'll help me get some sleep in these last few weeks!

I have to say, I'm so glad Omaha is the last time we'll be out of town before the baby gets here. I had a few 'freak out' moments - sweat dripped down my leg (OMG! Did my water break?), cramping in the night (Are those contractions!?). None of the things were anything to be concerned about, but it was the immediate - Holy cow, we are 3 hours away from my doctor, my family and our house! I can't go into labor here!! Once my rational brain took over, I calmed down. I was never really scared I was in labor, more of the thought of what would happen if I DID go into labor.

Now that we are about 6 weeks away from our due date, it's all feeling very real. The thought that realistically 'go time' is just around the corner (but hopefully not TOO close) is exciting and scary! I almost wish we would have done our classes just a bit earlier because now I have this fear of going into labor before we're really ready!

This morning I had some light cramping, pressure (like the baby was pushing down) and lower back pain that gave me a little bit of a scare. I looked up symptoms of 'pre term' labor and all 3 of those were on there. I went to the breakroom and put my feet up for about 10 minutes and they all pretty much went away after that. I was on the verge of calling the doctor, but I'm glad I waited since I feel much better. As excited as I am to meet this little man, I'm not THAT ready yet. I'd like to at least get thru this month. First of all, so he has every chance to be as fully developed as possible. Also, and this sounds terrible, but we have a million things to get thru this month before we're ready for him!! We have baby showers, wedding showers, birthday parties, and baby classes (childbirth, baptism, newborn, car seat and breastfeeding) all within the next month. All that said, as long as he is healthy, whenever he is ready to come, we are ready to have him - I just hope he's not quite ready yet. :)

The nausea/heartburn are almost constant. Sleeping is near impossible! Between the hip pains and the heartburn and the difficulty finding a comfortable position, I spend probably as much of the night tossing/turning as I do actually sleeping! I'm so lucky that I've gone this long and am just now having issues so I can't really complain.

The weather has been gorgeous again this week so we've been out walking! It feels great to get out there and get some fresh air! I've also started feeling more 'defined' little body parts poking out. It started at birthing class last week when I got either a little foot or fist right in the gut. It was this tiny little ball and was so cute. Yesterday it felt like an arm or leg sweeping across my belly! It's so much fun trying to figure out what it could be! I'm throwing Tracy's baby shower at our house this weekend, so every night has been cleaning a little bit here and there. I'm usually only good for about an hour max at a time before I get too worn out to keep going. But, I feel like I've got a good start on things so we should be good to go by Saturday!

Morning Sickness?

33 Weeks So much for skating through this pregnancy with no nausea! For the past week, almost every day, I've been extremely nauseous. My appetite has decreased and I've just felt sort of blah. Almost flu like...my face gets hot, my stomach sort of turns, it's super fun! I gotta say though, it's not unbearable and most women have it much worse so I'm thankful! I've also started having headaches quite a bit. Not quite bad enough to need meds so again, thankful! The stretch marks are awful! I may never be able to wear a 2 piece swim suit ever again! I'm going to try Mederma to see if that helps. I've read a lot of reviews that say it even helps with scars from acne on your face! My belly is hard as a rock most of the time! Sometimes I think it's from Braxton Hicks (which really I can't feel other than my belly just being hard) but it's like that the majority of the time. Still extremely tired!! Little man has started rolling more than kicking so sometimes it's more intense than a kick. He was up early this morning keeping me awake :). He's gotten shy too! He finally let my dad/Pat feel him move over the weekend in Wichita. But now, he'll move when I'm sitting or laying down, but as soon as I get up to show someone, he stops. The only person he keeps moving for is Nick. He loves his daddy already! It's pretty hard to get the motivation to get ready for work every day. Today was a 'curly hair' day because I just could not get myself out of bed in time to do the full blow dry/straighten routine. Everything just feels like it takes longer and definitely requires more energy. Luckily I have my 'back up' plan for those days when I just can't force myself to do it all. We start our childbirth prep classes tomorrow night! We have so many classes coming up in the next month that should hopefully help us be as prepared as possible for when he's actually here! The rug came in for the nursery and it's PERFECT! It matches perfectly and is the perfect size!

'Tis the Season

32 weeks

Yesterday was the first day of Spring, which means, Baby B will be here THIS season! We are now in the single digits for weeks left to go before we meet our little man!! The next 6 weeks may be the busiest 6 weeks of my life (showers, weddings, birthdays, etc) but I'm hoping that will just help the time go by faster to meet him!

I'm still having the chocolate cravings and today I just randomly started craving strawberries. Totally out of the blue! It wasn't overwhelming, but they still sound really good! A trip to the store for some fresh ones may be in order tonight! I have noticed that the hunger has started to go away. I don't need my afternoon snack hardly at all anymore. Yesterday we had a fairly big breakfast and I just had a little snack (fries and a milkshake - lol) for lunch. But, surprisingly, I wasn't STARVING for dinner.

Every week that passes, it seems the more tired I am getting. Yesterday Nick woke up early, usually the time I wake up, and I could barely open my eyes. Finally I was hungry enough that I got up to make breakfast. We ran a couple of errands and my plan was to come home and take a nap. I was so tired and my eyes felt so heavy. It was absolutely gorgeous outside, but I just wanted a little nap. Of course I couldn't fall asleep and finally got up and ran to the grocery store. Well, the tiredness combined with the heat (it wasn't really hot as much as beautiful, but for me it felt overwhelmingly warm), didn't help matters. We were having Drew/Erin over for dinner and the KU game later and I felt like there were a million things to do.

By the time I got home, I just couldn't even take it anymore. I put the groceries away and went to lay down. That's when the Jessie Spano 'Hot Sundae' meltdown began. As I laid down, I just started sobbing. I was grumpy and tired and hot, but it was so gorgeous outside and Nick was trying to take care of everything for dinner. I felt so guilty that I couldn't be enjoying the weather with him, and getting all the things done that I wanted. I'm very much the work then play personality type, but in this case, I couldn't work because I was so exhausted! Nick was wonderful and just told me to get some rest, which I finally was able to get a bit of a nap in and felt much better when I woke up!

I am so used to being go go go, even pregnant. I've been able so far to pretty much still handle everything around the house. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, getting the baby's room together, etc. I feel like I'm reaching a point where I just can't do it all anymore. I'm terrible at asking for help because that means admitting I can't do it myself. Luckily I have a wonderful husband who just wants to make things easier for me in whatever way he can. I feel blessed to have him and blessed that we've gotten this far with me still being able to keep up my normal routine. I think staying active is part of what has helped me to this point.

I finally broke down and ordered some 'warmer weather' maternity clothes that will hopefully be here this week. As mild and really goregous as it's been, it's been a little too warm for me and long sleeved shirts. Let's hope they fit and are cute enough for work so I can get some relief!!

Chubby Cheeks

31 weeks

We've got some chubby cheeks on our hands!! We had our sonogram this week to see how big Baby B is and like the little model he is, he gave us lots of great looks at his face!! The first thing we could see were his chubby cheeks!! They are so cute and we just want to kiss and pinch them already. He is head down, and hopefully stays that way! Seeing how he's positioned confirmed the little round ball I've been feeling under the right side of my ribs is definitely his little butt! He's definitely a little mover! I drank some Diet Dr Pepper before the sono to get him moving and he even had little hiccups! It was so cute!!

He's definitely a big boy...but not big enough to be concerned. At this stage, he should weigh about 3lbs and he's coming in at a whopping 4 lbs 4 oz! He is in the 78% percentile right now and the doctor said everything looks good and healthy. One thing we also learned was that I just happen to have lots of amniotic fluid around the little guy. Sometimes this can be a sign of gestational diabetes or other issues, but everything with him checks out great and no cause for concern! They like to see a range of 5 to 25 cm of fluid and I had 25cm!! Which explains why I'm measuring ahead of schedule and why I've gained more weight. The good thing is, a lot of it will come out at the birth!! We have another ultrasound in 4 weeks so we'll get another look at him!

The weather has finally started to warm up here and it's been gorgeous all week long! Nick and I have been taking Oscar for a walk every night possible after work. Not only does Oscar love it, but it's good for me and the baby and it's great for Nick and I. We have time to ourselves, no tv or distractions, to just talk about our day. It's been a great way for us to stay connected. We talk about everything and it's great because it gives us the chance to make sure we're on the same page about big ticket stuff, but also we have fun talking about the little stuff too! It's not always all about Baby B, but we are both so excited to meet him that he usually comes up at least once or twice.

I've started getting stretchmarks pretty badly and am just hoping they don't get too deep before he gets here. I use Basq cream to minimize the effects of them. I am a LOT more tired now. Yesterday was St. Patrick's Day and I was asleep on the couch by 8!! LOL! Sleeping has become more difficult as the belly has gotten a lot bigger. It's harder to sit up/change positions, etc. Luckily I haven't been hit too badly with the bathroom bug yet. I do still have to go quite often, but not constantly yet like some women talk about. That could all change soon. I'm also hot ALL THE TIME! My feet sweat, my armpits, everything just feels hot!!

Time has started to creep by, or at least it feels that way. Even though the weeks go by fast, it feels like the time to meet the baby has slowed down. We only have 9 weeks left which seems crazy! When I look back on it, it's flown by. But now it seems like eternity until he's here. I'm sure it'll fly by and pretty soon we'll look back and miss the anticipation of getting to meet him. I have to remind myself you only get to be pregnant for the first time once, so I want to soak it in and enjoy it. I've lucked out in the comfort department. Other than sleeping, I really don't feel that uncomfortable during the day. Very little back pain so far. My legs/feet cramp, but other than that, I feel really good. While I'd have gone through much worse to have the opportunity to experience this and meet our son, he's been so easy on his mama, it makes me love him even more!

Shower time!!

30 weeks

We had another amazing baby shower this weekend. This one was thrown by Mia, Erin and my fabulous friends - Jessi, Tracy and Kristin! Again, Baby B and I were totally spoiled! We have pretty much everything we could possibly need for him!! We also found out that he's not only getting 1 girlfriend (Tracy's having a girl) but 2!! Kristin found out last week that she is having a girl as well!! I'm so excited to start shopping for baby girl clothes!!

The nursery is about 95% DONE!! I'm so happy with the way it turned out. It looks awesome. Pictures are below, and we've added a few things since then. I'll try and post a final pic when it's 100% finished! Here is a before pic looking into the room from the doorway:

And a couple of 'after' pics:

Here's a before pic in the door to the left:

And the after:

All that is missing now is a rug, his name on the wall and the baby!! Nick took these pictures and didn't clean up some of the clutter so I'll have to take some pictures when it's nice and clean!! It's all starting to feel so much more real now. We've gone from having almost nothing to almost everything in a matter of a couple weeks!! Now that the nursery is pretty much done, we've just got to start making room in the kitchen and bathroom for all his stuff there!

He is moving all over the place now! It's a lot of fun feeling him all the time. It's started to get to a point where sometimes his little jabs are almost painful, but not terrible. He's really active in the mornings and when I lay down at night. I do my kick counts when I wake up and when I go to bed. You are supposed to count 10 kicks in an hour, I usually don't even make it to 10 minutes! LOL! He's pretty active!!

I'm still feeling really pretty good. I'm getting more tired now, but really no serious back pain or anything yet. I think I've started to notice the dreaded stretch marks!! EW!! I was hoping to avoid them, but it looks like they are inevitable. I'm so short so my belly is just sticking straight out in front of me! He's sitting pretty low, he has pretty much the whole time, so he's living up to the wives' tale that you carry boys lower.

I've started finally having a few cravings. And it's for things I never really ate much of when I wasn't pregnant. Ice cream and chocolate. Both things I don't mind, but never really ever HAD to have before. Now it just sounds so good! Especially ice cream!

We get to get another look at him next week! The doctor said at our last appointment that I'm measuring a little bigger than I should be, but she thinks it's due to my height. Just to be safe, she wants to take a look at him and see how he's measuring now. So we can make any necessary decisions if for some reason he's going to be big. I'm so glad there's nothing terribly wrong that we're looking at, but also excited to get to see him again! I bet he's changed so much since the last time we saw him!!

I'm definitely starting to get little fears here and there that something may be wrong with him that we don't know about yet. I've done a pretty good job of trying to push those thoughts out of my mind and not focus on them, but it is something that worries me. Since we didn't do any of the prenatal testing, there is a chance something could be wrong that we don't know about. I'm just trusting God that everything will be ok. We've been so blessed and lucky up to this point, no reason to start doubting things now!

Baby Shower #1

29 weeks

We had our first baby shower this weekend! Judy threw it for us, along with some help from the aunts - Carol, Diane and Jan, and the girls - Erin and Lori. It was amazing! Judy went above and beyond. It had a 'King of the Jungle' theme and it was so cute! She had all these little homemade decorations to go along with it.

The first is a baby carriage made out of receiving blankets, diapers and a crib sheet. This was the centerpiece for the gift table! SO CUTE!

These were little pacifiers on the cake table that she made too! Totally edible!

This was what the centerpieces of the tables looked like. She made the little booties out of tissues, cotton balls and little ketchup bowls and filled them with mixed nuts! Genius! Then each table had a stuffed animal with a baby bottled filled with M&M's. Baby B now has a full collection of stuffed animals!

Below is a picture of the cake table. The them was so fun and the cake was awesome! The cake might be the only thing she didn't make by hand!

And finally, here is a picture of me and the Grandma's! I have been avoiding cameras, but for the sake of looking back on these later, I figured I'd put a picture of me in here to see what I looked like!

The shower was so much fun! I can't say enough about how hard Judy worked and how wonderful it turned out. We got so many great things for Baby B!! Lots of clothes, but we also got a lot of our 'big' stuff which was nice. We got our stroller (thanks Great Grandpa Hoyle), carseat (Judy), bassinet (Elsie), swing, highchair (Meme and Poppy) and so many other great things! We got it home and it took up the whole living room almost! We are in the process of going through it all and putting everything away. We have another shower this weekend and I want to get everything in place before we get more stuff! This baby (and I) are so lucky to have so many people who love us and can't wait to meet him!

As far as symptoms go, this week I've been feeling much more tired. I got a couple comments this weekend about my eyes looking tired. I'm starting to slow down a bit. I definitely am shorter on oxygen. I don't know if that's from my organs pushing up or what. It's becoming more and more difficult to shave my legs, put my shoes on, etc. I have started limiting my 'bending over' to only when it's absolutely necessary! At the shower when I would bend over too far to pick something up, baby would respond as if I was smushing him! LOL!

The nursery is almost completely done! I'll do a post later this week with pictures and updates on that front!

3 months to go!

28 weeks

We have 3 months left!! I can't believe we are in our 3rd trimester already. It feels like so long ago since we found out, but the time has seriously flown by!! I don't want it to go too quickly, but at the same time, I can't wait to meet, hold, kiss, hug, feed, stare at my little man!!

Phase 2 of the nursery is complete! Paint is up and looks great!!

Phase 3 hit a bit of a snag. We went out to NFM to look for nursery furniture. We saw the original crib we wanted (and went out there specifically to see) and I didn't like it in person. It was easily scratched and just not as 'sturdy' as I wanted. We saw another really expensive set that was awesome. Great quality and so gorgeous! We were almost settled on it, but the color was just too dark. So, we kept looking. I will say, NFM would NOT be a high recommendation on my list of places to shop for baby furniture. We would see one thing and they would be sold out, or find someone else but it only came in a certain color. We finally found THE set we wanted, around our price range, we loved the color AND we loved the crib and dresser together. We picked it out and were ready to buy...what do you know - they were sold out and had no idea when they would get it in. I was getting overwhelmed because I just wanted to walk out of their with his furniture that night! Nick checked online and found the same crib we wanted was sold a couple of places online, including Target.

On our way home, we stopped by the Target in Mission and sure enough, there was our crib and the matching changing table. We got both of them loaded up and got them home!! I was so excited to start putting them together on Friday night. We got the changing table up with no problems. We started on the crib and realized they sent us 2 'right back legs' instead of one of each. We called the company and they are sending the replacement part this week. We also ordered the dresser online and it should be here this week also! Right now, it's making me agitated because our house is a mess! All the stuff I was hoping to get put away once his furniture was in place is sitting on our dining room table and it's making me crazy!!

I did get all his clothes that he already has washed this weekend (3 loads worth!!!) and all his new blankets and bedding. All his clothes are put away and just waiting for him to rock them out! I was very glad to get ahead of the ball on those since our first shower is this weekend and I'm sure we'll get more things to put away!! I'm so glad we decided to get the dresser AND changing table because I think we'll need all the extra storage!!

We are having a hard time finding a chair for his room. I really don't want the wooden ones with the cushions, or anything with microsuede but I'm thinking that might be the only kind that will fit with all the other furniture. There just aren't many options out there! We went a few places yesterday and just didn't find anything we really liked. Or if we did, it was discontinued or we didn't like the color and it would take 12-14 weeks to get a special order! Again, overwhelmed mama!! I'm just so ready for his stuff to be set up and see it all together so I think it's making me frustrated that it's not done yet! Nick has been so wonderful and patient thru this whole process.

Saturday was a great day. I got an amazing prenatal massage (seriously best massage ever) and a pedicure! Both felt so good! There were 2 other pregnant women getting pedi's - the one next to me was due today!! I also went shopping with my mom for outfits for my showers. I found a couple of dresses, but I'm just not sure if they are keepers or not. I know I'm supposed to get bigger being pregnant, but sometimes I just feel HUGE!!

As far as pregnancy symptoms go this week the biggest thing I think has been my mood. I've just been so agitated and irritable. I think getting back to the gym and getting his room all set up with definitely help with that. Other than our shower and hopefully getting his furniture in this week, we have a doctor's appointment where I have to take my glucose test! I've been avoiding as much sugar as possible so I don't have to take the 3 hour test if I fail this one!

Nursery update!

27 weeks

The closet overhaul was a success!! The blue/teal paint turned out awesome! At first it looked a little darker than I wanted, but after it fully dried, I ended up loving the color!! I designed the closet system I wanted online at Home Depot and printed out everything we would need. My dad and Pat were supposed to come up Friday night and start work on the closet on Saturday. Sadly, my dad's best friend Ed got some terrible news the week before. His son Eddie, who was literally one DAY younger than me, had died unexpectedly. They still aren't sure what the cause was, but either way, it was such sad news for their family. The funeral ended up being Saturday morning which delayed my parents arrival until Saturday afternoon. We had Nick's graduation dinner that night with all the family (mine and his) so the closet was put on hold until Sunday.

Dinner was great. We went to Chappell's and the food was wonderful! It was such a cool place with all this sports memorabelia and the owner came back and talked to us for a little while and was such a cool guy! Nick got some cool gifts, a Baker sweatshirt, a couple gift cards and baby B got his first KU basketball jersey from Uncle Dave!!

Sunday morning we got up, went to breakfast (thinking the closet couldn't possibly take too long) and came home so they could start working on it. Nick and my dad got started at about 10 am and the poor things worked pretty much straight through until 6:30 pm!! I felt so bad for my poor dad! They had to drive all the way back to Wichita after they finished, but I am so grateful and thankful that he came to install the closet! He's so good at that stuff and him and Nick made a great team. Everything went up pretty easily, there was just a lot of cutting things down to size to fit into our closet. It seriously looks so amazing! Even better than I had pictured in my head!

Here is a picture of how it turned out! I put his shoes and just one little outfit hanging! I plan on getting the rest of his clothes washed and hung up soon too!

Some new developments with little man this week are he's moving so much you can actually SEE it now. He was putting on a show for Nick and Judy Sunday night. He's moving and kicking a lot, but still just fun to feel, not painful. I've started having Braxton Hicks contractions every once in awhile. Last week I had a few that were pretty intense. Not painful, just pressure. I had my first episode of 'pregnancy heartburn/acid reflux' this weekend. It was awful!! Luckily it only lasted a couple of days!

Phases 2 and 3 of the nursery should hopefully be completed this week. Phase 2 is painting the walls. I got everything taped last night and am going to get all the supplies at lunch today. Nick is going to start painting tonight and hopefully we'll have it done in the next couple of days. Phase 3 will be furniture!! We have scrapped the idea of the first crib we wanted. We found another one we really like on Amazon and it turns out Nebraska Furniture Mart has the same one for less! We're going to head out there later this week to look around and hopefully buy/pick up our furniture so we can put it all together this weekend!

Our first baby shower is next weekend with another one the following weekend. I'm so excited for those! Now I just need to find something to wear!! Valentine's Day was yesterday, but we decided to keep it low key. We went to Jalapeno's for 2 for 1 taco night! It was perfect! I'm trying to soak up as much time with Nick as possible before baby makes 3! We have our next appointment next week and the doctor will go over what to expect during the 3rd trimester (so Nick is coming with me) AND I have to take my blood glucose test. I hope everything comes out ok!!

A little scare

26 weeks

We had a little bit of a scare last night. Little man must be on a sleeping binge this week or turned some other direction because I've barely been able to feel him move. It always makes me nervous when that happens because I'm afraid something is wrong. I had noticed for the past couple of days that he has been more quiet than normal and definitely more quiet than when we were on vacation and he was moving all around. I got so nervous that yesterday morning, I busted out the at home heart monitor and of course, I found his little heart beat right away. It sounded strong and that put me at ease.

As the day went on however, he was still pretty quiet. I Google'd 'fetal movement at 26 weeks' just to see what came up. A lot of the links had other moms who were experiencing the same decrease in movement around this time. That made me feel a lot better and I had little movements here and there to let me know he was still in there enjoying life! I even realized one of the things I've been feeling (low, steady little pitter patters almost like a heartbeat down low in my pelvis) are actually him having hiccups!! He gets them a lot. I first noticed them on vacation but thought it was just him moving around. Now I know it's just him having hiccups!

Well, last night, I was pretty active all night cleaning and getting the house ready for my parents to come up this weekend. When we went to lay down, baby was almost uncomfortably quiet. I tried to poke my stomach to wake him up, shined a flashlight (only for a few seconds) on my stomach to see if that would make him move and nothing. After he didn't respond to the flashlight, I got a little nervous. I drank some orange juice to see if that would spark him up and still, not much. I busted out the heart monitor again and for the first time since he was really tiny and hard to find, I couldn't find the heartbeat. I tried to stay calm because my doctor has told me the problem with those 'at home' ones is they can cause unnecessary concern when you can't find a heartbeat. She said they aren't nearly as sensitive as the ones they have so if the baby is turned just right, you may not hear the heartbeat. Of course, none of this made me feel better while I was frantically trying to find it. Every once in awhile we'd hear a little blip that I think might have been him moving around, but at the time, it wasn't enough to satisfy my concerns. Finally after about 15 mins, we picked up just a few seconds of his heartbeat, but not long enough for me to feel comfortable.

Nick reassured me that's what we heard and everything was fine, so I made myself go to sleep. I kept waking up all night long and not feeling anything (which is normal for him but for some reason didn't feel normal last night). This morning I woke up and usually that's a pretty active time for him and he was just silent. I got up a little early, drank some orange juice and once again, busted out the heart monitor. THANK GOD I found his little hearbeat right away. Same place it was yesterday morning, beating strong and finally he started to move around a little bit. I've started feeling him a little more this morning so I'm starting to calm down.

I've started to realize that this happens almost every week too! LOL! I think he must be adjusting to my schedule at work and during the week must catch up on his sleep while I'm at my desk. It seems like he's super active on the weekends when we're on the go and by mid-week, I'm in a panic because he's slowed down. Either that, or I'm just focusing on it more when I'm just sitting at my desk. Going forward I'm going to try and just stay calm and not get upset when he's quiet unless there is a reason. At 28 weeks is when I should be feeling him a lot more and even counting his kicks/movements. Until then, I've got to try and keep the freak outs under control!

Creative juices are flowing

Week 26

Everyone is having a hard time believing that I haven't started the nursery yet. I'm such a planner and try to do things as far in advance as possible, so it is a little surprising even to me, that we haven't started yet. However, we decided to wait until AFTER Nick was done with school and we were back from our vacation to start working on it. I'm really glad we did because I've changed my mind a few times since I started designing things and now I feel like I'm really ready to go.

The nursery bedding came in over our vacation so as soon as we got home, I ripped it open!! I

was so excited to see it. I really like what I picked out, but I LOVE the color theme we've decided to go with. I'd had this picked out from the Land of Nod when we first got pregnant, but still kept my eyes open for other things. I came back to this one and just loved the concept. Even better, the week I ordered it, it had just gotten back in stock (after being on back order for weeks) and we got FREE SHIPPING!

Here is a picture from the website of the bedding!

Nick thought it looked a little too 'sissy' at first, but I like how it's very calming colors and it gives us lots of freedom with decorating choices. A lot of things out there for boys right now are themed, and it's mostly animals or cars. Lots of monkeys, jungle themes, etc. While some of that stuff is so cute, it just wasn't what I was wanting for our baby's room. I wanted something that was not only soothing for the baby, but something we would enjoy also.

We have just started the process of getting the nursery together (don't worry - I've started taking more pictures so we'll have the 'before and after' ones to post) and I'm so excited! My dad and step mom are coming up this weekend and we are installing a closet system with shelving to make it more functional for a baby.

We have narrowed down our paint for the walls to 2 different greens and just last night, I decided to paint the closet! Since the closet won't have doors anymore and I really have been wanting to incorporate more of the 'teal/blue' from the bedding, it came to me last night. I'm going to repaint the inside of the closet with the blue color since the walls will be green. I'm hoping it'll look as good as I'm picturing, because in my mind, it's not only a pop of color, but it should add some depth and help the closet look more put together.

That's on the agenda for tonight so hopefully it can be dry by this weekend for my Dad and Nick to build the shevles. Last night Nick and I combined our closets and dressers together for the first time since living in our house! It actually went much smoother than I imagined. We were able to easily fit things where they needed to be and we got a bunch of things to donate to Goodwill!

The baby has started moving a TON lately. It's so much fun to feel him and sometimes even see it. I'm really hoping he'll move a lot this weekend so my parents will be able to feel it. A few changes that I've noticed over vacation are I am definitely more tired. This is probably from the 'pregnancy insomnia' that has set in. Once I get to sleep, I'm ok...for awhile. One trip to the bathroom or shift in positions and I wake up and can't fall back asleep. I also wake up super early and when I'm up and moving around on weekends, I can be go go go. It's times when I stop and am sitting that I tend to get more tired. Especially sitting at my desk at work!

Bathroom visits have kicked up quite a bit. That was fun on the airplanes...LOL! My hips have started to hurt again when I sleep. I'm really thinking it's because I'm not getting to the gym and walking as much. We walked a lot on vacation which kept the pain away, but now that we are home, I've been on the go trying to work on the nursery. I hope to get back on schedule next week with at least walking at the gym. I feel like when I walk more, my hips don't hurt so that's even more motivation to get to the gym. I've started being even more vigilant about making sure I'm getting lots of protein, fruits and veggies in my diet. Not only to keep weight gain under control, but so little man gets as many vitamins and nutrients as he needs. We ate pretty badly on vacation so it's nice to be back in a routine. We also finished up our registry this weekend. Invitations for 2 of our showers went out and we wanted it done for anyone who's an earlybird shopper!

Nick has been fantastic! When we were registering this weekend, when we were looking at paint and closet options, he'd start to realize when I got easily overwhelmed and has learned to sort of talk me through it instead of trying to 'fix it'. Once he gets me talking through it, I find I start to sort of calm down and can focus more on the task at hand, rather than the finished product which gets me overwhelmed. I find myself getting more overwhelmed than normal, but he's been amazing at getting me to calm down. Last night when I made the last minute decision that we were going to paint the inside of the closet, I went in, during the KU vs. MU game and decided to start taking the current shelf and rod down myself. I got the shelf down, but got stuck on the shelf support. Instead of getting angry, which normally may have been his reaction, he was more concerned about me hurting myself. At half time, he came in and got all the rest of the stuff down so I could start taping to paint tonight! It was a small thing, but I noticed and really appreciated it because he's been so helpful.

I'll try and post pics next week of the finished closet! Next weekend the guest bedroom furniture gets moved out and hopefully soon a crib will be in. We are on the hunt for a crib because I don't think I like the one I originally picked out!

Extended Vacation

Week 26

We've been on a bit of a hiatus the last couple of weeks!! We went on our trip to LA, which was WONDERFUL, but thanks to a nasty snow storm that hit about 90% of the country, we were unable to get home as planned. The vacation was supposed to be Thursday January 27th to Monday January 31st. As sad as we were to leave the gorgeous LA weather, we knew we had to get back home. Apparently, Mother Nature had other plans for us. Our flight was scheduled and 'On Time', however about an hour away from landing in KC, they stopped us in Denver and told us the Kansas City Airport was shut down and we'd need to either stay in Denver or go back west and try and fly out the next day. After some pregnancy hormone fueled tears and about half an hour to figure out our next move, we decided to head to where else.....LAS VEGAS! As much as it sounds like the 'fun' way out, it actually also made the most sense. They had the cheapest rooms and the most flights out of there to Kansas City.

We got to Vegas last Monday night, with a flight booked for the next day - the day the storm was supposed to hit. We were about 15% confident that we'd get out as planned on Tuesday and that was mostly based on the hope that, as usual, the weathermen would be wrong. Of course, this would be the ONE TIME they got it right on the nose. KCI airport was shut down all day Tuesday so our flight that night was cancelled and the next available flight wasn't until Thursday morning. Once we knew we'd be stuck for a few days, we decided to just make the best of it. We knew we probably wouldn't be going on a vacation for awhile once little man is here and this was just forcing us to really enjoy it.

I was so glad it happened because we really got time just the 2 of us and got to really enjoy each other. While we were in LA, I kept thinking about all the exciting and even stressful things we had at home. I kept trying to tell myself to just take this time and be in the moment. Enjoy it because it's going to fly, but it was so hard!! Having that little extension at the end really allowed me to relax and enjoy it.

A few of the highlights of our vacation:
- Lakers game in LA - we saw lots of celebrities: Khloe and Rob Kardashian, Chris Harrison (host of The Bachelor), Kenda Wilkinson and Hank Baskett, Jack Nicholson and a few other randoms. This is a good tidbit to show what society is like right now - most of the 'celebrities' we saw, were reality TV personalities!

- KU game watch party in Huntington Beach at Sharkeez. A girl from KU, recently graduated and relocated out in Cali, works at a bar Sharkeez. For every big KU game, she organizes a watch party for the local alumni/fans. It was a blast. We met some really fun people and everyone was so welcoming and nice! The little beach town was awesome too!

- Beach day - we drove up to Malibu, down to Venice Beach, basically up and down the coast just watching surfers, the beach, the waves, it was a fun day!

- The Grove - we went to the outdoor shopping mall The Grove and did a little shopping. BUT, we also got to see Matthew Morrison (aka Mr. Schuester from Glee - my fave show right now) perform his first solo concert. He was great and it was cool to see him up close!

- The Citadel Outlet Malls - this was Nick's idea but it was so cool! They had a Carter's Outlet, Old Navy outlet and even stores we don't have here at home! We got Baby B TONS of super cute clothes. We even went to a fancy 'LA boutique' Bel Bambini and bought an expensive, but super soft, onesie. I got some FABULOUS 'LA' shoes. Since clothes aren't fitting quite like they used to, shoes and accessories are my new obsession. Ok, so shoes aren't really a 'new' obsession, just taken to a whole new level!

- Ketchup with Matty - our dear friend Matt Hugunin flew out to LA for a work conference and was staying downtown near the Staples Center. Well, the hotel he was staying in just happened to be the same hotel my friend Pete from Meadowbrook now worked. So we got a drink there first so I could say hit to Petey and then hit LA for dinner. We went to Ketchup (a place I've seen on TV as a big celeb spot) so I was pretty excited! The food was great and we had even better company!!

- Criss Angel show in Vegas - neither of us had ever been to a Vegas show and since we had taken on the 'make the best of it' attitude, we decided to go all out. We got the tickets for half price and got 2nd row seats!! I'm not a believer in 'magic' but it was pretty cool to see it upclose. The show was entertaining.

- Walking the strip - we went out and walked the strip the night before we left for Vegas. It was pretty chilly in Vegas, but we wanted to get out and see some of the new hotels before we left. We stopped by the shops at Planet Hollywood and they had a Gap store in there. After stopping in a few different Gap stores in LA, all without maternity sections, I was so excited to find not only that they had a maternity section, but that it was HUGE! They had some great sales on shirts so I got a few. We went in to the new Cosmopolitan hotel and it was gorgeous!!

Overall, the trip was so much fun! We were definitely ready to be home and missed our house and our little Oscar!! We came back to quite a bit of snow on the ground. I think overall the KC area got about 12-14". Nick had to spend some time shoveling the driveway and a path for Osci in the backyard, but we pretty quickly got caught up on house stuff and are back in the groove!

Mr. Bossy Pants

24 weeks

So last week I talked about how I had felt quite a bit of movement and I was sure Nick would be able to feel the baby move soon. I was right!! Saturday morning little man was super active and I had Nick put his hand on my stomach. After a few minutes, baby gave a good kick right where Nick's hand was! He was pretty active most of the weekend (more in the mornings) and I even saw my stomach jump a few times!! He seems to like Oscar already! If I lay on my right side in bed and Oscar curls up next to me, the baby finds that spot and starts moving right there. I don't know if it's the heat from Oscar or what, but I just hope they are that happy next to each other when he's actually here!

I've also noticed he's started being a little demanding. No matter what pants I have on, if it's the full panel maternity pants with the tightest part being right under my bra, or my pajama pants with the waist right under my belly, he will find the spot and start kicking like a mad man! It's pretty funny. He already needs his space. He's also gets pretty active when he's hungry - especially if it's later than a normal eating time. We went out to dinner on Friday with Drew and Erin and it was a late dinner. I had a snack but as we were waiting to be seated, he started getting really active and I can only guess it's because he was hungry. As demanding as it may be, I love feeling him move!!

We went out to dinner on Saturday night for my mom's birthday. I really wanted him to move so she could feel it, but he was worn out from all his acrobatics earlier that day I think. We're definitely getting closer to everyone else getting to feel him I think.

Another topic from last week was the car hunt! Well, we bit the bullet! On Saturday morning we got up and drove 2 vehicles - a Toyota Highlander and a Nissan Pathfinder. We were mainly there to look at the Pathfinder, but I wanted to just drive the Highlander to see how they drive. I really loved the look of them and felt like that's what I wanted, but had never driven one. However, this one had more miles and was a little more expensive than we wanted. After driving the 2, there really was NO comparison! The Highlander was so far above and beyond the Pathfinder, even with leather and all these options, in my mind, it couldn't touch the Highlander. So after some debate and a little 'haggling', we walked out with a new car! It's a 2003 White Highlander and her name is Heidi. Although I had a little panic moment because of the miles (we bought her with 140K), they are good cars and hopefully she'll live up to the reputation those cars have for being long lasting! I love her, she drives great and I will feel so much better having little man in a big, safe car and being able to comfortably transport him and all his gear!

We leave for LA on Thursday and it's supposed to be low to mid 70's the entire time we're there! It's been snowing and cold here so we are so ready for a break!!

Man on the move...

23 weeks

We've had lots of new things happening this week!! The main thing has been his movements!! I feel him all day long at different times. He seems to be most active before I wake up in the morning, around the time I eat breakfast, after lunch and as I'm settling down to watch tv/go to bed for the night. Nick hasn't gotten to feel him quite yet, but I think we're getting very close! The last few days I've been able to feel him outside my belly when he's really being active! As I'm typing this he's moving like a maniac!

We started our registry over the weekend at Babies R Us. We were there for 2 hours and only got maybe halfway thru the store!! I think we got the hardest and most important things picked out and we are just so excited for all the fun stuff to start!! I wasn't originally going to get a bassinet or anything for our room, but after talking to other new moms (thanks Linds!) I decided I want one. I don't think I'm going to want him that far away from me right at the beginning!

We have our nursery decor narrowed down to our final choice and I think we may be ordering it this week!! I won't post it here until we get it just in case I change my mind. The swatches for the bedding should be here any day and I was kind of waiting for them first to be able to make SURE that's what I want. I am SO excited to start the nursery! I think it will all start to feel even more real when we actually see where the little man will be sleeping!

Sleeping has started to get a little more uncomfortable as my stomach as just sort of 'popped' in the last couple of weeks. It's starting to be more firm and now there is no question there's a baby in there!! I've been trying to be super careful about only sleeping on my left side as the books say, but sometimes I just can't get back to sleep that way. Sometimes I switch to the right side and sometimes I just sort of lay back and prop myself up to where I'm almost sitting up. It's actually comfortable!

I had a doctors appointment this morning and it went really well. We went over his ultrasound pics and she said everything was perfect!! I've gained a total so far of 29 POUNDS! This was my big fear, especially since I didn't want to gain more than 30 lbs total, but my doctor is not at all concerned. She said it's a perfectly normal amount and that some women slow down and plateau or even lose a little weight in the 3rd trimester. I hope I at least slow down so I'm not too big by the end. I've been so extremely lucky so far in feeling great and I hope that continues!

The big decicion in the Barbosa household this week is selling my beloved Cindy Civic and getting an used SUV (for the same price as we sell her) for me to have with the baby. We've had some serious snow storms here the past couple of weeks and she just isn't a fan of the snow. On top of that, I don't feel that she is big enough safety or comfort wise for me to be traveling around in with the baby. The logical, money conscious side of me is having a hard time wrapping my mind around selling/trading my 2006 Honda Civic, with only 53K miles and in great condition and getting an older, bigger car with more miles, will cost more in gas and could potentially have more maintenance issues. But then that little guy moves in my belly and I know exactly why we are doing it. Yes, we could make it work with Nick's car, but I just want to be sure that in any given situation, our baby is always as safe as possible. Having an SUV will not only help in terms of driving in bad weather, but will hopefully have better protection in the event of any kind of accident and will have more room to haul all his stuff around!! Right now the car at the top of the list is a Toyota Highlander. I've heard nothing but good things about them and we feel like it's a great choice for us given the reliability of Toyota's and their tendency to last for many many years and miles!

We leave for LA next week and I'm so excited to be in the warm weather!! It's been really cold/snowy here and we are ready for a break! Nick is DONE with his Masters NEXT WEEK! I am so incredibly proud of him and the sacrifice he made to help set our little family up for a bright and wonderful future!

Goodbye and Hello!

22 weeks

This week starts off with a sad Goodbye. Nick's grandma, Jeanette Hoyle, passed away Sunday, January 9th at 2am. She was a wonderful, caring woman and will be greatly missed. It breaks my heart that baby B won't get to meet her, but he will know all about her and how much she loved him already. Her funeral was yesterday and it was actually an amazing service. The Pastor did a wonderful job at really capturing who she was and how she lived her life. Nick's grandpa was such an inspiration to be around. He is going to miss the love of his life very much, but we got more of a sense of true happiness and gratefulness for the 60 years of marriage they had together. He knew she was better off and no longer in pain.

Ironically, this goodbye lead me to a hello. With the funeral coming, I had to find something to wear since my normal 'funeral' attire isn't fitting at the moment. Since I needed something quickly, I finally went into Destination Maternity at 119th and Nall (behind Crate and Barrel). All I have to say is HELLO my new favorite!! They were so wonderful and helpful. While I didn't find a dress for the funeral, I found some super comfortable and affordable pants for work!

The baby bump is definitely obvious now. Not just for people who know me, but even strangers I think can tell there's a baby in there! I'm slowly adjusting to the new body. It was so hard at first because I just feel big all around. I can't even look at the scale anymore because the number scares me to DEATH!

Last week I was a little worried about not feeling much movement from the little man, but I realized I was! And of course in a way I had been bashing before (another Aubree foot in mouth moment). When I first started reading about how it would feel when the baby moved, I read about the 'flutters', etc and that some women didn't realize it was movement they were feeling, they thought it was gas. I thought they were CRAZY! I would say 'those are also the women who don't know they are pregnant until the baby is about to pop out!'. Well, that was easy for me to say at the time, because when I first started feeling the baby move consistently, he was kicking. It was unlike any other feeling I'd ever had before and thought that's how it always felt. Until last week. I had some 'flutters' or 'bubbles' in my pelvis almost every night. And like those women I joked about previously, at first I thought it was gas or just some stomach churning. After a few days, however, I realized that it HAD to be the baby. Not only was there no 'end result' of these so called 'gas bubbles', but it was so consistent. The other night it was quite frequent so I think we're maybe getting closer to feeling him from the outside too! Right now, he's being a little brat and every time I feel him, I'll put my hand there and he'll stop! He's shy for now!

We are heading to Babies R Us this weekend to start the registry process. Mostly to make sure we pick out the bedding so we can be ready to start on the nursery in a few weeks! We got signed up for our childbirth preparation classes so we're well on our way!

Happy New Year

21 weeks
Happy 2011!! Our little man will be here THIS YEAR!! It's so exciting! Now we can officially say not only that he'll be here THIS year, but he'll be here the next season!

Our New Years Eve was pretty uneventful. I spent the entire (seriously, all day) cleaning the house. Everyone thinks the nesting has started. I'm talking I took all the food out of the fridge and scrubbed it down, scrubbed the bathrooms, put all the final random Christmas stuff away - well, pretty much anything on our main level that could be cleaned, WAS cleaned!

New Years Day was more cleaning, only I had help (thanks Nick!) and we focused completely on the basement. Our storage room had become a complete mess! You could barely walk in there...OH and the laundry room was disgusting! So, after hours and hours of cleaning (scrubbing the washing machine and vacuuming the laundry room floor) and clearing out the storage room, we now have 2 beautiful, clean, functional, completely organized spaces to put things when our house is overloaded with baby stuff!!

Unfortunately, late in the afternoon on New Years Day, we got some very sad news. Nick's Grandma Hoyle (Judy's mom) was in the ICU. She had a bad fall back on Dec 20th and we thought she just hurt her back/ribs. It turns out, she must have hit her head pretty badly and they discovered blood around her brain on New Years Day. She was in a coma and they ran some more tests. We spent most of that evening at the hospital with his family. Sunday morning they put a tube in to drain the blood from her brain, and while it helped, they found out Monday morning that even more blood had accumulated and there was nothing more they could do. We were at the hospital all morning yesterday with the family saying our goodbyes. They took her off all the machines and we are now waiting for her to pass in peace. It breaks my heart that baby B won't be able to meet her, but he will know her through our memories and will know how much she loved him already.

I'm starting to feel much better than I did last week. I'm determined to get into the gym at least 3 times a week and start eating more healthy. We've got our first baby shower booked and another 'tentative' date set for a second one. Baby's movements have been hit or miss still, but he definitel lets me know if he's uncomfortable! I still have my little concerns when I haven't felt him move for awhile but I think that mostly comes from the fact that his movements are so sporadic that sometimes I feel like it's been longer than it really has!