Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Where's my waist??!

14 weeks

While I was very lucky not to have many typical pregnancy symptoms during the first trimester, I did have one that freaked me out. The WEIGHT GAIN! All these books and websites tell you, 'ohhh, you should only gain about 5 pounds during your first trimester'. Well, 10 weeks in and I was already double that mark!

I knew I didn't want to be one of those people that just ate everything in sight. First of all, I want to eat healthy for my baby. Secondly, I don't want to struggle to lose all the weight after. But, I was used to cooking with low/no fat foods and being very careful about how much I ate. My doctor advised me to just embrace this time, start using the 'full fat' ingredients for 2 reasons - 1. There aren't enough studies out to determine if the lower fat options are harmful to the baby and 2. As she said - this is the time to enjoy it! I think that change is initially what packed on the pounds.

I was so concerned I was gaining too fast, I talked with the doctor about it. The doctor said not to worry (music to my ears) and it would go up and then even out as the pregnancy progressed. Well, they were right! I ended up losing 3 pounds after the 2nd trimester started and have evened out on the weight gain now. It's much more of a slow, steady gain instead of a huge rush of pounds.

I think this is much healthier not only for me, but for the baby. I don't want to overwhelm the baby with too many bad foods, however, all this baby wants right now is cheeseburgers! I've had to give up chinese food, Chipotle and even my beloved mexican food as eating all three have cause some serious stomach issues!

Thanksgiving is tomorrow so hopefully Baby B enjoys all the Turkey Day trimmings because I definitely plan on pulling out the maternity jeans to have lots of room!

Prenatal Testing

Prenatal Testing - 2 of the scariest words I think I've heard together! Trying to make the decision on whether or not to get these tests was incredibly difficult for me.

Growing up around children with anywhere from mild to severe learning disabilities, birth defects and other issues, I knew that if there was anyway I could prevent a child from going through that, I would consider it. However, I also knew I didn't want to do super invasive prenatal testing that could harm me or the baby.

At our 'heartbeat appointment' we had to decide if we wanted to do any of this testing. While we could change our mind either way on the later tests, there was a test that if done, had to be done between 11-13 weeks. This was a simple blood/ultrasound test to determine your chances of having a child with different birth defects, one being down syndrome. I thought a blood test and ultrasound seemed harmless enough so I called my insurance company. They said they would cover the majority of the testing, so we decided to agree to do this testing.

Now whether it was a sign or God trying to tell us something, when we get to the doctor that day they can't do the tests. Not only that, but the scheduler for making the appointments was gone as well. They said they'd call us on Monday. Ok, no problem. In my mind, I had made up my mind.

Monday rolls around and the patient services rep calls from the doctor telling me our insurance won't cover much of the test after all. Whether intentional or not, there was a hint of doubt in her voice if we should even do the test. This sent me in to a complete TAILSPIN! The decision I was so sure about 3 days before, was now confusing me more than ever! Nick and I talked about it, I talked to my dad, my sister and then called the doctor for her opinion. These tests have a high chance of giving both false positive and false negative results. I wasn't sure I could handle a false positive after the stress I went through worrying about miscarrige (unecessarily) for the first trimester.

I finally realized I had reached my breaking point. If I didn't get control of my constant anxiety and fear over everything being ok, I was going to spend my entire pregnancy worrying about things going wrong, instead of enjoying the ride. I decided right then I was not having the test and I was going to leave the stress behind me. I have to say, once I made that decision, I have truly been able to let go and enjoy the pregnancy.

These tests are there for a reason, and if it were 100% accurate, I would have paid any amount of money for it. Some people know that it will not change their mind no matter what. However, Nick and I both knew the outcome could affect our decision, which is why we wanted to weigh all our options. Not everyone will have as difficult a decision on this, but for me, it was hard but I truly feel we made the right choice for us.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

1st Trimester

Since I'm a little late starting this, the 1st trimest will just be in one post.

I was SOOOOOO lucky in my first trimester. I had maybe a handful of days where I felt nausea, but never got sick. I had a few days of low energy or being more tired than normal, but never was it to the point where I couldn't still go about my regular life.

The thing that was hardest for me in that first 12 weeks, was keeping it secret and the constant fear of something going wrong. Every doctor, website and book tells you that first 12 weeks is so critical and anything can happen.

At my first doctor's appointment, the doctor just did a physical exam to make sure everything looked good, along with a few blood tests, we didn't get any confirmation that the baby was actually there. We had to wait another 4 weeks to get to hear the heartbeat and that was the longest 4 weeks of my life!! They say once you establish a heartbeat, your chance of miscarriage goes down to almost nothing, so I just wanted to hear that little beat.

Well, being me, I got impatient and we bought an at home heart monitor to try and hear the baby's heartbeat early. We read reviews and all these things about where to listen and what to listen for. We thought FOR SURE we found the heartbeat right away. Now, I look back and laugh because we were WAY off. What I thought was the heartbeat was actually my own heartbeat behind what they call 'fetal movement'. And I couldn't have been more off on the location. I was all the way over to the right side of my pelvis and the baby is actually almost right under my belly button! After discovering that no, that was in fact NOT the heartbeat, I was even more anxious to hear it!!

On Friday, October 29th, we had our next appointment and this was the 'heartbeat' appointment. I was nervous because our doctor wasn't going to be there (thanks to my impatience in wanting to bump the appointment up and having to go on a day she was out). Also, our annual Halloween party was the next day so if they found the heartbeat, GREAT! We could tell anyone that didn't already know because we'd be in the clear. BUT, what if they didn't find it? I was so afraid I'd be so distraught I'd want to cancel the whole party. That Friday was the longest day of my life!! I could NOT wait for our 4 pm appointment!

We got to our doctor's office and I was just so ready. My doctor had already warned me that there was a 50/50 chance they might not find the heartbeat right away so they'd have to do an ultrasound, so I was prepared for that. The doctor that day also said 'I'm right on top of it so it might take me just a minute to find it'....he didn't even finish that sentence when I heard the most wonderful sound in the world! He found it right away, beating strongly and loudly confirming that our little baby was there!! I immediately broke into some of the happiest tears of my life. It was a mix of emotions - happy AND relieved. I had no reason to be nervous, as we have no family history of pregnancy issues, but that first 12 weeks was brutal for this already anxious mama!! We then felt like we were 'in the clear' to tell any one else who didn't already know about our wonderful news!

Baby B Blog

We are a little over 3 and a half months into our first pregnancy and everyone is telling me to start a journal. They say to keep track of these things because as soon as the baby gets here, you totally forget!

So, here goes from what I can remember so far. We found out on Friday, September 13th that we were expecting and were 5 weeks pregnant! It was such a memorable and happy day. It was also a surprise since it was the first month we'd really be 'trying' to get pregnant and it worked!!

We ended up telling our families that weekend and everyone was so excited!! It's the first grandchild for most of our family so it was extra exciting. We had to wait to tell my dad and step-mom until the following weekend because we wanted to tell them in person. I think telling all our parents has been one of the most memorable times in my life.

But, just so I don't forget, here's how it went down:
We had a Barbosa family gathering on that Saturday and decided that would be the best time to make the announcement since everyone would be in one spot and it was probably the last time we'd see everyone together before the holidays. So we went to Nick's parents house that morning and Nick announced that I was '5 months pregnant' instead of 5 weeks. It was so funny because I think Gary and Judy were so caught off guard by the 5 months that the fact that we were pregnant took a minute to register! But of course, they were so excited!!!
We announced to the Barbosa clan that night and of course came more tears, hugs and total joy from everyone. Elsie announced that night that the baby will call her 'GG'. It was so cute. And this time, Nick got the weeks vs. months part right ;)
We went to my mom's the next day because I had something to drop off at her house. I handed it to her and then said 'I have one more thing to tell you. You're going to be a grandma.'. Everyone told us we should have recorded her reaction and I wish we would have. She burst into tears and was just so happy. She kept telling Nick 'thank you so much'! It was so funny. Then, she ran upstairs and grabbed baby clothes!! She was so ready for a grandbaby, she already had a few little outfits bought!!
Since my dad and Pat would be coming up the following weekend for a KU game, we decided that's when we would tell them. We wanted to stick w/the KU theme, so we bought a little KU sippy cup and some KU pacifiers and put them in a little bag. We got our tailgate set up (on what was a windy and cold day on the hill) and I said I had something for them. I handed my dad the bag and he opened it. At first, he laughed b/c he thought the cup was so cute. And then you could see the minute it registered what the gift meant. I confirmed, that yes, we were pregnant and him and Pat both started crying. We all hugged and cried and it was another wonderful memory.

We had decided to keep the fact that we were trying quiet at first in case there were any complications or issues. We didn't want to get our families hopes up until we knew what we would be dealing with. Everyone so surprised because they thought we were waiting for a couple years to start a family.

That week is one I never want to forget as telling our family and a few of our close friends were some of the best moments of my life. We are lucky to have such a wonderful family and so many great friends that were all just truly happy and excited to share this journey with us!